never too long

We used to be the shiny patrons
of a lovely empire going down
we let the jugglers and the lions
take care of our frowns

You held your spirits high
i laid my dreams down next to yours
till i was groped by burning fevers
and you ran out of cures.

So we never kissed good-night
beneath the auburn autumn skies
we never met the demons
that stood to be defied
and we never tried.

But we agreed there is still time
and we can surely water down the wine
still you should know
-although all my thoughts always come back to you-
i might be getting tired
somewhere down the line.

Safe tonight

the room smells of parafine and beer
and durex ultra light
the stains illustrate the scent
we've broken every right
all that's left is bent
The doormat in the doorway smiles
and cries "darling, looking good tonight!"

"we should make babies!"
"i don't know", I said,
"i mean,
high cheekbones
and low self-esteem
we're certainly two of a kind
but who knows if we'll end up together,
i mean, apart from tonight".

So we talk
till there's nothing left but loss
for the both of us
the way we look tonight
doesn't make anything right
and again we realize
as we sit and watch the youth go by
that life goes on, but why.

no title

the highs are high
the lows are low
you're driven to a fall
because you got nowhere to go

you collect the traces
of a miracle dressed in blue
and it mirrors all the faces
of the one woman you knew

you were governed by circumstance
and your soft-featured opium friend
who took you through this sequence
in a lightless train

in trite words you gave an overview
of your straightforward baby soul
you made an attempt to declare
where you were coming from
but you looked like her cathedral
in the desert sun

so you hunt down the details
when all she had was love
and you're burying your luck
like it's a thankless task.

lyrics

and like the weddings
and bar mitzvahs
we celebrate
the anniversary

of the worst day
and the worst year
we have so far
lived to see

as in the worst fears
of those who haven't
started drinking
-just yet

cause they knew to
suppress the dreaming
by reaching only for
what they could get.

at times we'd tell them
we are orphans
to give explanations
for the pain

and then we teach them
it is not right
to apologize
for their gains

cause they'd donate
all they care about
until there's nothing left
but the birthday cake

because they're so stuck
and so confused
that they trust we know
what is at stake

so like pets
we raise them inside
to protect them
from the grief

cause if we loved something
we'd let it go
but if we love someone
we leave.

so we travel
to the other side
to find the green grass
that we left

and the orphans
tell their stories
of their failures
and distress

and they cross their legs
and wait to see
whatever happens
to their fairy plot

cause we still believe
we have a fair chance
until rock covers paper
and then what?

and it's time
and it's time
and we tell them
there's no way

"cause i"m an ocean
i'm an airplane
i'm a man
and i am free".

draft

the orphaned kids and dealers are running for the door
the old man with the bear traps stops to wonder
what he's been hunting for...
the rebels in the backyard are singing "mon amour"....

what tom said to sarah who wasn't there

i walked in with no expectations
you left with no goodbye
and between "fuck you"
and "come back"
i'm torn apart
by a broken heart
that i have to hide.

the clocks ain't moving
the days won't go by
they stopped at "come back"
"with the truth or with a lie".

and i hate
to realize
that i'm a child
i'm a child
i dream like a child
i play like a child
i am a toy like a child
i am a fool like a child
i am naive like a child
even when i say that i'm a big boy now
i am guilty like a child
i have done that and bought t-shirts
from everywhere i've been
and i haven't learned a thing.

strange child

then you said there's time for us "if nothing intervenes"
and i howled at my limited window of luck
but my plans are greater than my secrets
and they're both fighting in my dreams

and your heart burns in pace
with the ailments of the brave
who start from scratch every night
so you knock down the pillows
and watch the bridges fall
but the child in your mind
feels left behind
and it's reaching for another guide

so you walk out taking the memory
of an episode in the symphony
like a man of great civility
full of nightmares and uncertainty
and there's no one at the door who cares.

before (draft)

before the tired eyes of time took a close-up shot of the truth behind the lies
before the beast they all liked better than the man put itself to sleep and died
before all the signs of kindness were withdrawn with just one word
before silence broke the tired cheers you deny you ever heard

before we fought down the sparkling mirage of being in control
before the golden dawn shed daylight over the most eternal goal

that's when we believed.
that's when we had it all.